I Am My Own Woman

I Am My Own Woman

July 9, 2007 Diary 0

*today’s foray into self-empowerment is brought to you by McCafe and loads of pent-up energy that should have been released days ago. Now, on with the show…*

This is probably the most overused phrase in this new century – and it isn’t even feminist.

If we stick with the strict, old, French definition of feminism, La Femme becomes La Scary Femme: old feminists believed that women were better than men, that women owned the world, and that the hand that rocked the cradle could very well rock the earth off its orbit.

I stick to the mild definition, which, I believe, is the more empowering one. La Femme is all woman, and her own woman: woman is on the same footing as man, and no one is better or worse than the other. We’re all here to help each other, so let’s not put anyone down or say or do anything denigrating or degrading to the opposite sex.

World peace. Way cool.

Anyway, to return to my phrase: I am my own woman.

What does this mean?

I am who I am. Everyone can say what they want. Everyone can insult me, malign me, or debase me. Everyone can compliment me, fantasize about me, or worship me. But the truth is, I am only as good as I make myself to be.

I am who I am.

I am only as good as I can make myself, as bad as I make myself, and as effective as I can manage. No one can say what I am, because I know myself best. I am my own woman, and no one can say otherwise.

Funny how things can happen because of tragedy – but, more precisely, funny how you sometimes realize your own powers when the universe seems to conspire to take them away from you. In these last few days, I have been challenged: my self-esteem has taken a beating, from the physical aspects of me, to the behavioral and spiritual aspects, to even my own abilities to stay focused or help people – the whole world seemed to echo that Inez was worth nothing.

Pinned to the ground, I should have lost everything, from my sanity to my withering self-worth. Instead, I found myself standing up, brushing myself off, and walking tall again.

This had never happened so quickly before, and I thank God for wisdom and age. Yes, she is not the old and tired woman, but she is certainly old and wise.

And she is her own woman.

True love happens when you love yourself – and you know that you are truly in love when you can recognize that you love yourself better.

That is Inez’s attempt at profundity, which isn’t working, but which might work with more coffee. After all, Inez is her own woman; she can deal with some weirdness once in a while.

*The ending of this foray into self-empowerment is brought to you by Health Lab in Makati. Because fasting can make you dizzy, but it can tell you a lot about your blood when that blood finally leaves you. Now, if I could only get my eyes to see straight…*